A night with my brother and Mister Gold

Mister Gold and I had been out on a few dates during the Summer. He was really nice to me. Nothing special happened. We didn't sleep together, so I can't make any comments on his performance.

I had made plans to hang out with my brother and the girl he was dating at the moment. I told Mister Gold that my brother and I have a special relationship. We're really close and are extremely frank about each other's potential spouses. We have a right to veto. Mister Gold didn't seem that freaked out, I guess he wanted to meet the person who has such a special place in my heart.

We met on a Friday night. I had just had dinner with my brother and his "girl" and went for drinks afterwards. Mister Gold had been out with a few friends and met up with us later. He was really nice to me, but seemed sort of anxious and really stressed out - I wasn't sure what was going on... Until I realized that he did all he could to impress my brother. The way he was flaunting his stuff pissed me off, I just couldn't believe the things I was hearing. It felt like he had to tell my brother everything about his stupid boats, his ridiculously expensive hobbies and travels and whatnots. Side note: my brother is extremely wealthy, so Mister Gold's attempt in throwing his money around didn't really go as planned. The evening went so-so. Mister Gold was more interested in talking with my brother than being around me and it annoyed the hell out of me.

We shared a taxi. My brother and I went home and left Mister Gold on the way. By the time we got home it was around 5 a.m. I felt exhausted. I could have easily lived a happy life without ever having to experience that.

Afterwards my brother told me that Mister Gold had talked about me on every possible occasion. A lot. He asked my brother if I was seeing someone else, because I felt "weird and distant". He also said that he liked me a lot, but I never answered his feelings. I never witnessed these conversations, I guess they had them when I was out of hearing range.

His thoughts could be accurate. I didn't answer any of his feelings because I didn't feel that way.

I had made plans to meet Mister Gold later that week, but I sent him a text saying I will never see him again. He answered me with a "Ok then.". What the hell is that? First you tell my brother how much you like me and want to spend the rest of your life with me, and the next day you're fine with never seeing me again. Puh-lease.

But please, Mister whatsyourcolour. Don't go talking personal stuff to my brother. He's not that into hearing how much "you've fallen for me", he probably knows it already. Men tend to fall for me and my brother is used to seeing and hearing all kinds of stuff when it comes to his baby sister.

Summer-y stuff

I met this guy from another city a few days ago. I was out in his home city, in a pub, and the guy started talking to me. We totally clicked. I didn't get his phone number, and didn't give mine out either. My cousins and brother whisked me away from him. Total bummer. I actually forgot him when writing my post yesterday. Whoopsie.

... Until I found him on Tinder.
Now he's my Tinder match, we started talking yesterday. He lives 100 miles away, in the same city as Mister White and my brother. Turns out I'll be spending every other weekend in their home city, either partying with my cousins or meeting up with the cutest men I know. Most likely I'll be combining the two and loving every second of it. This guy surprised me instantly, he asked for my phone number (no surprise there), but he invited me to stay the weekend at his place. Why not. 

One of my best friends is getting married next weekend. No chance of me missing out on that fun, so I'll have to meet him in two weeks... Feels like such a long time. But I'll have loads of fun talking and WhatsApping with him until we meet.

I asked him "If you had 48 hours with me, how would you spend it?"
He answered me by giving me a list of activities:

Bike around the city and go for a picnic
Give me a tour of the city, showing me all his favourite places
Cuddle like crazy
Go for a jog
Play beach volley with his friends
See a movie
Sleep together, as close as it gets
Go skinny dipping in the middle of the night. If we're alone at the beach, who knows what might happen.

The best thing with him is that he has no idea about my desires or wants, and I won't share them with him until I'm in his arms. I have Mister Ink in my life to rock my world, this new guy could be a potential boyfriend. I say that about everyone new nowadays, and take it back in a few days.

Summer 2014, please be fucking beautiful.

May day, May day

I'm not a very shy girl - a quality that my friends often take advantage of. I'm challenged to do weird stuff almost daily. This is a story about my May day challenge.

International worker's day (also known as Labour Day here in Europe) is celebrated on May 1st. This year May 1st was a Thursday, and I took the Friday off. My dear friend Katy challenged me to pick up a guy at the airport, catch a flight with him and spend a few days in a strange city with a strange guy.

Well, here's how it all happened.

I left work early on Wednesday. I was at the airport at 1 p.m., looking around for sweet-looking guys. A flight to Barcelona was due to depart at 5 p.m. - another flight to Lisbon at 4 p.m. As I walked in, I decided to find myself on either flight - I wanted to spend my long weekend somewhere warm (because I packed my suitcase with sundresses, heels and a pair of polka-dotted bikinis). I saw this tall, muscular guy in Converse shoes. He was checking in, looking kind of distressed, not really getting the self-check-in automat. I approached him, asked him if he needed help and told him about Katy challenging me to do something this silly and spontaneous. He got really excited about my little dare and invited me to join him in his five-star hotel in Lisbon. So, I picked up my credit card, bought a trip to Lisbon to spend a long weekend with a guy I didn't know.

I selected him because he had cool shoes and a cute smile. And he was in his early thirties, with no engagement ring. He's now called Mister Tan.

Mister Tan had originally planned to visit Lisbon with two friends. They had separate rooms in a fancy-ass hotel in central Lisbon. I mean, the room was freaking fantastic. First night in Lisbon, I was wearing a cute little dress and high heels. We went to dinner with Mister Tan's friends. It was a cozy seafood restaurant, where the waiters spoke nothing but Portuguese. Luckily I studied Spanish in high school, so I had a slight clue on how to order meals and drinks. Things worked out really well. It was pleasantly warm in the evening, we got lost in the narrow alleys of Lisbon, drank a pitcher of sangria and went back to the hotel. Mister Tan was the cutest: I turned off the lights, climbed into bed with him and said good night. I heard him sigh and say "I... I don't really date, so I have no idea about these things... Am I supposed to kiss you or what?" I had no comeback, just tried not to laugh at his face. He kissed me on the mouth, really gently, and said good night.

We didn't see his friends for the rest of the trip. May day was spent at the beach. We were feeding each other strawberries, having a great time, chilling, drinking sangria and caipirinha, chatting away on mundane things, swimming in the Atlantic and whatnot. I really enjoyed my time with him. He never really touched me when we were outside our hotel room, but after Thursday, he was just sweet and gentle. It felt like he really cared for me, he made love to me so tenderly. I really liked his style. That went on for four more days, us having fun in the city, almost feeling like friends, and lovers in the night. Just the way I liked it. I had the best four days of my life with him.

The last day I felt a weird vibe between us. I asked him to tell me stories, and he didn't really have anything to share. That was, until he told me that he was building a house outside the metropolis that I live in. What guy builds his own house? I really didn't like to ask any more questions. I sincerely think that he is in a relationship. Not cool.

The flight home was really a pain in the butt. Since I bought my trip a lot after Mister Tan, I sat about ten rows behind him. I had no one to lean on, no shoulder to rest my head on. I slept for a maximum of two hours. My flight landed at 5 a.m. Phew.
Mister Red picked me up at the airport. He had worked all night and was really tired, yet anxious to see me. Well, he drove me home, pulled my hair and did his tricks on me, and left. I wasn't sure if I was angry at him or not - I mean, I was grateful for the ride home, but I was way too tired to have sex with him... I told him that, but he didn't listen to me - just pushed me to my bedroom, undressed me and worked his magic on me. I won't text him anymore. I guess.

My motto. Thanks, Barney.

So, this was my May day challenge. Can't wait what Midsummer brings...

Meow.

A miserable Monday

This is a story about how you should always have an escape plan when dating guys from Tinder.

I met a cute guy on Tinder. Let's call him ... no, let's not call him anything. Random guy #1 is enough. He had one or two pictures on his Tinder profile, no background info. To be honest, I think he looked kinda cute. I started talking to him and he seemed nice. I got his phone number and we started texting. We made plans for Monday night. I got off work really late, but I really wanted to meet this guy - he seemed really interesting.

He gave me his address and I went to his place, we'd decided to watch a movie (and I was supposed to stay the night, obviously). The guy I met at the door was extremely different than the guy I imagined meeting. He was about 5 feet tall (that's about 150 cm for you European people), a good 6 inches (15 cm) shorter than myself. He seemed apologetic somehow, as if he'd known that he would disappoint me. Or maybe he was disappointed that I was this tall?
I promised him earlier that we'd watch a movie together. Fuuuuuuuuck, how do I get out of this?

This guy occupied the space where my brain used to be. No way out. Help?

He wanted me to sit on his bed, next to him, holding his hand throughout the movie. I can't even imagine the situation with a straight face anymore. I just couldn't do it. My brain went berserk inside my head, and for some reason I kept looking around his flat in stead of looking at the telly. He had a guitar hanging on the wall. I snatched it, sat with the guitar in my lap and started tuning it. Ha-ha-ha, he couldn't touch me!

At the perfect hour, just when I had tuned the guitar, Mister Yellow sent me a weird message with a picture of a horse. It was so utterly random, I could do nothing but wonder. I texted him back, asking him for help. I really needed him to save me from this one. He asked me to come over (surprise). I told Random Guy #1 that my friend had an emergency and I needed to leave ASAP. Mister Yellow was awesome, I told him that he just saved me from a terrible, weird-ass date, he laughed and thought the whole thing was "epic".

So, what did I learn?

• Always ask the guy how tall he is, especially if you're into tall men. My minimum is 6 ft, because I need to feel small in comparison to my man. That's just my thing, no need to deny it.
• Make an escape plan. Have friends call or text you during the date - you'll have a perfect excuse to leave.

Phew. Thank goodness I survived. Random Guy #1 texted me a few days ago, asked if we should meet next week. Umm, no? I told him I was dating someone else. Damn, I feel like a bitch.