Thursday, 10 April 2014

Tindering away - Kitty's secrets revealed!

My friends ask me frequently about my sudden success on Tinder.

As I've said earlier, I have around 700 Tinder matches. All of them extremely hot, I would date any one of them.  I'm really picky, I don't do unattractive men.

Obviously, I won't show you my Tinder profile. I won't show you any pictures of me or tell you the exact details on my profile text, but I will tell you what makes me tick and how I make guys hot for me. Honestly, it's not that hard.

Tips for pictures:
  • Have at least three pictures. A good picture quality would be nice - make sure your pictures aren't all out of focus. Blurry pictures are a no-no. 
  • Smile. I only meet nice, smiling guys.
  • Look normal. I bet you're really funny, but guys in weird Halloween costumes aren't my thing. That goes for weird hand gestures as well.  
  • Make sure you're not lost in the crowd. Don't use only group photos, that is. It's really hard to know what guy I'm checking out if there are 10 of them in every single picture.
  • Show off your interests: if you play hockey or football, show it by having a picture of yourself playing. Some occupations are really hot, too. Guys in uniforms make me purr (so if you're a policeman/fireman/pilot, show it, thank you!). 
  • If you own a dog or cat, show it as well.
  • If your body is covered in tattoos, please let guys know about it. Some men don't like their girls inked, some love it. For me that's a deal breaker.

Tips for a good profile text:
  • Keep it simple, stupid. Just a few words will do. Everyone focuses on pictures anyway.
  • Make sure you share enough info for guys to be interested. My profile text has just a few words, describing my hobbies. If there's something that you want people to know, say it.
  • If you're a guy, puh-leeeeease let me know how tall you are. 
  • If you have nothing to say, please don't write anything. I've seen loads of stupid-ass profile texts. Quotes aren't that hot, either.

Things that turn me off:
  • Shirtless guys - I know you're hot, but I'd like to find that out myself, thank you very much.
  • "Hi." Open a conversation by saying something real, ask me how my day or weekend is going, where my pictures were taken (I travel a lot). 
  • Don't be creepy. Don't call me sexy - you can call me Kitty or Kitten, but please. Don't make any weird assumptions, like I'll be making out with you instantly. Oh trust me, I won't.
  • Don't text me for weeks before asking me out. And girls, you can ask him out as well. I've initiated quite a few dates and you know what? They turned out just fine.
  • Boring conversations about weather. I ask you how you're doing, you answer by saying "Oh I'm well now that the sun is out! Too many rainy days make me drowsy." Kitty won't reply, I have nothing to say.
  • Married guys. I don't care if your wife is "cool with it" - please don't have any pictures of you and your wife. That's an instant no. Don't use photos with you kissing another girl, photos with a baby (unless the baby is yours). I don't usually do daddies either.

I've had some weird discussions with guys on Tinder. There was Mike (name edited), for example. I asked Mike what he likes to do on his free time, and he said "drugs". Cool. Nothing in common, delete from contacts. 

In conclusion, be smart, sexy and funny. Use humour in conversations, make sure you're remembered, so ask your matches something different. I usually ask mine for secrets ;)

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